Backyard of the cathedral

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Growing up playing hide and seek
at the backyard of the cathedral.

Garden of flowers mingled with trees;
towers, spires and the domes.
Inner courts and outer courts;
felt so different in young mind.

Mum with bible in her hands,
talking something I don’t understand.

I sought my head in curiosity;
to the focal of the secret place.
Tipped my toe and sealed my mouth;
Breath would cleft serenity!

Robes of priests, papal ferula;
they looked solemn and frowned at me.
Veil and altar communion,
don’t mess up and be still, kid!
This is not a place for freedom,
do what I’ve said and you’ll be set free.

Grown up knowing what is right,
trying harder to stay right.
Do this, do that, and they said;
no one hear my inner voice.

Started journey to find light,
chased the shadow that might fight.
Detour; crooked; made a turn;
sheep was lost but Grace found it.

Broken vessels He treasures,
Nothing ‘ve wasted!
He said to me.
Feed My sheep if that you would.

Tears in eyes but less on hands,
break my heart for what breaks Yours.
Two fishes and five loaves bread,
only He can feeds them all.

He’d seen me through
and watched me grow,
This is My plan, oh My child,
only when you trust in Me.

The backyard of the cathedral;
tiny body Big future.

I’ve marked you,
I’ve marked you;
as a daughter
of the great I AM!

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Hymn to a Good Wife


Finish my book of Proverbs on the last day of the new month.
This last passage has become my goal.
Wisdom gets you everywhere !

Hymn to a Good Wife

A good woman is hard to find,
and worth far more than diamonds.
Her husband trusts her without reserve,
and never has reason to regret it.
Never spiteful, she treats him generously all her life long.

She shops around for the
best yarns and cottons,
and enjoys knitting and sewing.
She’s like a trading ship
that sails to faraway places
and brings back exotic surprises.

She’s up before dawn,
preparing breakfast for her family and organizing her day.
She looks over a field and buys it,
then, with money she’s put aside, plants a garden.

First thing in the morning,
she dresses for work,
rolls up her sleeves, eager to get started.
She senses the worth of her work,
is in no hurry to call it quits for the day.
She’s skilled in the crafts of home and hearth, diligent in homemaking.

She’s quick to assist anyone in need,
reaches out to help the poor.
She doesn’t worry about her family when it snows;
their winter clothes are all mended and ready to wear.
She makes her own clothing,
and dresses in colorful linens and silks.

Her husband is greatly respected when he deliberates with the city fathers.
She designs gowns and sells them, brings the sweaters she knits to the dress shops.
Her clothes are well-made and elegant,
and she always faces tomorrow with a smile.

When she speaks she has something worthwhile to say,
and she always says it kindly.
She keeps an eye on everyone in her household,and keeps them all busy and productive.

Her children respect and bless her;
her husband joins in with words of praise: “Many women have done wonderful things,but you’ve outclassed them all!”

Charm can mislead
and beauty soon fades.
The woman to be admired and praised
is the woman who lives in the Fear-of-God.

Give her everything she deserves!
Festoon her life with praises!

Proverbs 31:10-31

The glimpse

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It’s the intricate details I miss the most.

The soft lines around the eyes

when you smile …

or that look you have;

the confusion between your brows;

which I stopped my hands to appeased;

sometimes ago that I could not begin to recall

– but I would know it if I saw it again.

It was the look that gave you away.

I’d know that look anywhere …

It will be my everything.

In the beginning

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… of 2019, I woke up with this view from my balcony;

It’s the shine that waken me up from my sick bed.

I love sky,

I believe every beautiful thing comes from above.

On the last service of the year,

He promised that this will be my year.

Looking at the beautiful canvas He painted above,

Isn’t that He still keeping His promises?

Would you, believe with me?

January 2019 – Singapore

Thanksgiving

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It is the time of the year again !

Every year during this season, I would dedicate a post to myself in this place, to reflect and to give thanks for all that have happened in a year.

1. Followers
First and foremost, I would like to thank the 475 lovely souls (at the time of the writing of this post), who are following my ups and downs throughout this year.

Give credit where credit is due – Most of the poems are originated from different authors and I do not own any copyright for articles posted as quotes herein. However, those articles remained heartfelt and reflected the very moment of my emotional state when it was posted. That being said, all words screamed the inner voice that was long for an escape in me. Thank you, for listening to my heart.

“There comes a time when the world gets quiet and the only thing left is your own heart. So you’d better learn the sound of it. Otherwise you’ll never understand what it’s saying.”

2. Career advancement
Another fruitful year in term of career, I am thankful to God for opening every door that shut on my face, and rewarded me abundantly in public for what I’ve been praying fervently in secret. Without Him, I can do nothing !

Whilst it remained a fiery desire in my heart for being ambitious, I have constantly reminded myself the two things that I could bring to the eternity, and career is neither of them ! Meanwhile my feet are landed on the ground, I aim to get a life that means something to myself; or to someone; which is more valuable than career itself – it is call purpose.

“The cost of a thing is the amount of what I will call life which is required to be exchanged for it, immediately or in the long run.”

3. Health
2018 is an unexpected deterioration in term of health. I have encountered the first time in my life a full anaesthesia performed on me for an unexpected surgery which came out of no where. I believe God is faithful, for all that happened, He will restore 120% !

“Stretch. Inhale. Exhale. Feel. Become. Aware.”

4. Family
Other things may change us, but we start and end with the family. I endeavour to keep myself moving and improving, but behind every good success and achievement, there is one powerful woman of God who keeping me in prayers every single minute. Thank you mum, and I love you.

“The best way to feel family is being part of it.”

5. Friendship and Relationship
Friendship – People who remained, are those that gonna be the friends forever! Thank you everyone for making my life a colourful one! This year, new friendship has brewed, and some of those are very dear to me, whom I wanted so much to carry on as friend.

“Don’t walk in front of me … I may not follow; don’t walk behind me … I may not lead; walk beside me … just be my friend”

Relationship – They say time doesn’t heal emotional pain, you need to learn how to let go. This is indeed the year of learning how to let go of the past. I was once believing that a broken heart could never have the same strength to cradle this thing call love. But God has proven me wrong.

We may be living in a world that being ‘instant’ is the ‘substance’ that moving us towards our heart desires. However, after the crushing and pressing of the grapes, a good wine goes on to the process of fermentation, clarification, and aging – which required time. This is what it’s all about. The past that I have let go, I would never want to pick it up again. However, I have learned to allow myself to be fragile; putting down the fences of guarding my heart; it is when I conceded to be vulnerable, I found the strength to love again. All I need, is the fortitude of valor to begin this journey.

“The emotion that can break your heart is sometimes the very one that heals it…”

6. Travel
From time to time, I would allow myself to have a solitude of moment with the greatest High. That is when I renewed my visions and dreams. I’ve spent a fair amount of time travelling the globe in this year only to found that slowly but steadily, I could enjoy the ‘restful’ moment without checking my work phone intermittently . It is vital, to have this selah every now and then. I have learned throughout my travel moment, listen to the ‘still small voice’ which guiding my path everyday. It is not about marking another territory where I setting my foot on, it is about another journey that He stays beside me – so faithfully. Indeed, I nearer than I was yesterday and further than I am today.

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”

7. River that flows
Last but definitely not least, this whole post will rendered meaningless without giving thanks to my God, who are the River that flows in my life for every season. I aim to go with the flow, the relentless twists and bends, acclimating to the motion, and a sense of being led by Him. I am hoping that in 2019, it will be a year of breakthrough for me, in all area.
_________________________
In the ever-shifting water of the river of this life – I was swimming, seeking comfort; I was wrestling waves to find a boulder I could cling to, a stone to hold me fast, where I might let the fretful water of this river round me pass.

And so I found an anchor, a blessed resting place, a trusty rock I called my Savior,
for there I would be safe.

From the river and its dangers,
and I proclaimed my rock divine,
and I prayed to it “protect me”

and the rock replied:

God is a river, not just a stone;
God is a wild, raging rapids;
And a slow, meandering flow;
God is a deep and narrow passage;
And a peaceful, sandy shoal;
God is the river, swimmer,
So let go …
_________________________

One thing I need, to end this year and entering the new – Courage.

Be right back

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“Scars are simply modern battle wounds.
Sometimes the enemy happens to be inside us.”

In a perfect world up there, my surgeon would be out of job !
Meanwhile on the earth, he will try to get the enemy out from me.
From the week onward, wait till my return — all my lovely bloggers !

Thank you for sparing me a thought in your prayers.